FANTASY FOOFARAW

Welcome to the first "Fantasy Foofaraw" of the season. But what is the "Fantasy Foofaraw" you may ask? Why the "Fantasy Foofaraw" is our weeklyish guide to fantasy baseball. Fair warning though, we hold know liability for ruining any fantasy baseball teams. We will however take complete credit when we help your team(s) achieve fantasy glory.

Why you shouldn't pay for closers- Jon Rauch. If you drafted, like many, before Joe Nathan went down (although somehow Nathan still managed to get drafted, after his injury, in several leagues, anyway) chances are Jon Rauch was not a player taken, even in deep, deep leagues. Which is hard to imagine, considering his adorable profile pic:

So you could just pick him up for virtual pennies and now he's 5 for 5 in save chances.

Of course it doesn't hurt to spend a little, rather than taking the dregs of the closer pool. (See Francisco, Frank)

If you drafted David Ortiz and expected him to start off 2010 with a bang, then well you are dumb. Yeah, I said it! The worst thing Ortiz could do was turn it on in the 2nd half last year, giving fantasy owners false hope for this season. He's on the downturn of his career. He's big and old, can't turn on inside pitches and can't hit lefties.

Now that being said, there's nothing wrong with having Ortiz on a deep mixed or AL-only league roster. But you do NOT have to start him. Unlike Terry Francona, you don't have to see him every day and there's a good chance he won't even know you benched him. Ya gotta think Francona is just hoping for an injury, so he won't feel bad about not playing Papi. Personally, I don't think that late season charge is on its way this year. AL-only and deep mixed league people, eye this situation and keep Mike Lowell and Jeremy Hermida on your radars.

Don't push the panic button on these fellas just yet:

HUNTER PENCE- Now sure, his team is abysmal, BUT he should still put up some good fantasy numbers. In fact I had him as one of the most underrated fantasy players in all the land when the season started. So don't look for him to Cory Hart you (Cory Hart: v. to show great potential and talent, leading to high expectations that are quickly dashed, ruining one's fantasy season), despite his hairdo:



YOVANNI GALLARDO- I don't generally get in the habit of sticking up for dudes named Yovanni, but I have high hopes for Gallardo, which is why he is the ace of several of my teams. So don't worry, fantasy goodness is on the way!

GRAB 'EM IF YOU CAN!

BARRY ZITO- He's not gonna be Cy Young Barry Zito, nor will he pitch this well the whole season. He has only faced the Astros and the Pirates for crying out loud! But he'll be a solid SP4 or 5 on any fantasy squad.

COLBY LEWIS- He dominated in Japan. JAPAN FOLKS! Worked for Cecil Fielder and Max "Hammer" Dubois, enough said!

No? Not enough said, you say? Okay, how 'bout this- he just struckout 10 Indians in 5.1 innings and that ain't bad.

SETH SMITH- Sure he's platooning, but if you are in a daily transaction league and have the time and effort to know when he's playing and can plug him into your lineup, you could be ridin' a gravy train with biscuit wheels!

STREAM WEAVER
In "Stream Weaver" we'll give you some good streaming options for the upcoming weekend. Enjoy!

TOM GORZELANNY, CHC (4/16) vs. Houston- Is Tom Gorzelanny the answer to all your pitching woes? Certainly not! Is he the answer to some? In the long run, no. But he's pitching against the Astros this week, and the 'Stros have fewer HRs and RBIs than Albert Pujols.

MIKE LEAKE, CIN (4/16) @ Pittsburgh- Sure Leake is not established, making this a bit more of a gamble. But he did do a good job of keeping the ball away from the Cubs' bats. Of course that was partly because he walked 7 Cubbies in 6.2 IP. And he skipped the minors altogether, so yes he is a bit of a wild card, but he has big upside, especially against the Buccos!

JAMIE GARCIA, STL (4/16) vs. New York- Garcia is another young gun with very little track record. The Mets are struggling and Oliver Perez is his opponent, so I like the chance for the "W".

JEREMY BONDERMAN, DET (4/16) @ Seattle- Bonderman looked sharp in his first start and will head into a great pitcher park against what has thus far been a punchless Mariners offense. The only downside to this, he's up against King Felix, so the "W" is by no means a "lock".

Not a ton of viable streaming options for Saturday and not a lot of probables shown for Sunday, so there!

That concludes our first "Fantasy Foofaraw" of the season, hope you enjoyed, and if not, well, it doesn't really matter.