Okay, well, week thirteen is upon us, and sure, I didn't make a pick for the Packers-Cowboys game, but if it's on the NFL Network does it really count? It does? Bah! Any game that I have to travel to seven bars and over three towns to find shouldn't count. That's what I says anyways. Well, if you are scoring at home I would've picked the Packers, so there! Ya happy? Anyways, we've gotta a lot on our plates right now. There's half a cheesesteak, chips...no just kidding, I met our metaphoric plate, which is not covered with anything nearly as delicious. So this week we're gonna cut down on the words, but hopefully not the entertainment value. So since this is the time of year, when Oscar "buzz" is all around, so we're gonna go with a movie themed week thirteen picks, inserting some classic movie quotes to get the job done. Enjoy:
FALCONS @ RAMS: "Frankly my dear I don't give a damn!" Well it's true. Rams 24-17.
BILLS @ REDSKINS: "I coulda been a contenda" Could go for either squad. Not to say they're both outta the playoff picture, but they can ill afford a loss this week. Bills 17-13.
LIONS @ VIKINGS: "Yo, Adriaaaaaaaaan!" Uh, Petersen that is. He's back in the lineup, which is bad news for Kitna and the Lions. Vikes 28-27.
TEXANS @ TITANS: "They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time it works, every time." If only VY was that consistent. Texans 12-9.
JAGUARS @ COLTS: "You'll get nothing and like it!" If only it were that easy Jags. Colts 13-10.
JETS @ DOLPHINS: "Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell." Nothing to do with Sunday's game, just pretinent anyday I feel. Jets 21-14.
CHARGERS @ CHIEFS: "You're gonna eat lightning and crap thunder!" Well I don't think the Chiefs will be eating up the Bolts, but Herm Edwards should be crappin' something after the game. Chargers 31-17.
SEAHAWKS @ EAGLES: "I had a rough night and I hate the f**kin Eagles man!" I don't personally have anything against the Eagles, I just thought there should be a Big Lebowski quote in here somewhere. Eagles 24-20.
49ERS @ PANTHERS: "U-G-L-Y. You ain'y got no alibi! You ugly! You ugly! Yo momma said your oogly!" I think that about sums up the Niners offense and probably this matchup. Panthers 13-9.
BUCCANEERS @ SAINTS: "The price is wrong, bitch!" Saints 27-17.
BROWNS @ CARDINALS: "Dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!" I mean Browns and Cards playing a somewhat meaningful game in December? Wow. Browns 30-24.
BRONCOS @ RAIDERS: "I knew it, I'm surrounded by assholes!" Broncos 24-20.
GIANTS @ BEARS:"It's like watching a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob out there!" Giants 21-10.
BENGALS @ STEELERS:" Fasten your seatbelts it's gonna be a bumpy night." Steelers 28-17.
PATRIOTS @ RAVENS: "Yeah crabcakes and football, that's what Maryland does!" Well they're half right. Pats 37-9.
Academy Award Corrections: On the Sixes
8 years ago
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