Friday, October 01, 2004

I'll take Potent Potables for $600 Alex.

Well here it, the much anticipated, long awaited, classic overphrases of what will go down in history has the Best Weekend Ever-Interleague/Old-Stlye.
The participants:
Dr. Chaos himself, Mark "One can of soda" Phelps
The Drunken 5'11 Irishman, Casey, better known as Toastie and lesser known as Shortstop
Jitter- 6'10 baller from Landfill, OH
Jables- The biggest user of Tums in the greater Albany area
Billy- The man behind the "fourth wall" (that means he held the camera)
The Red-Faced Bostonian-Thomas C. O'Connor, aka Tucker
His pal and confidant, Reyn
Danny "you're dead to me" Banazek
Myself, Willie Moe Pain-ya!, a bitter young man with too many hats.
Oh yeah and Dunford

On with the show:
"I'm 5'11!"-Toastie

" Mega-Mart No Thank You! (In reference to my glorious mesh hat)! Mini-mart, yes please."-Jitter

Upon entering the city of Chi-ga-go and seeing an inactive tank:
Toastie, "Why is there a tank there?" My reply, "In case there's a war." (insert Bill giggling here)

"I thought it was the New Jersey album, I was gonna throw myself out of the van!"- Billy

After having to pull off the highway, we looked to Tucker for answers: Us in the van, "Tommy, what's going on?" Tommy's reply, "Anybody got any gum?" (enter the repeated lines from Norm MacDonald as David Letterman on SNL)

In reference to a candy bar mishap on a previous trip, to Montreal, "No candy bars for TOASTIE!"-Phelps

"G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-UN-IT!" Bill to some random African-American in Landfill, OH, to which Bill got G-united right back.

"Rock-it!"-Everyone

Toastie, after pumping his fist to a Chi-ga-go bus driver, driving by, "The bus driver rocked me back!"

"Red, pink and blue. God Bless America!"- Me, in reference to the colors of the three wristbands I was donning at the time.

Made up TV spot for the Kroger beverage, Dr. K, "Hey Jitter, how 'bout an house call?" "Ahhhh, just what the doctor ordered!"

"We need constant attention."- My response to our special waitress at the Chi-ga-go bar Sluggers, when asked if we needed anything

"I'm eyeing that soda"- Me in a whisper to Toastie, upon Phelps hopping in the van with a solo can of soda.

"9 inches!"-Don't ask!

"All of it higher"

"AJ Feely, without question, the next Hugh Millen"-Me

"Classic Over-Stroh's!"-Jitter

"I haven't seen a wave that sad since Little League."- Me to Phelps at Miler Park in Wilewaukee, WI

"All of it lower!"

"DUNFORD, watch the road!!!!!"-Everyone in the van fearing for their respective lives.

At the Cubs game (I heard this one second-hand):
Phelps: It's cold.
Dunford: That's why they call it the Windy City.
Tucker (to Phelps): Just punch him in the face Phelpsy."
Editor's note: The term "Windy City" does not actually refer to the weather but to the city's political nature.

"Someone put him out of his misery."-Some random girl while watching Tommy attempt to hula-hoop outside of Wrigley Field

"I'm gonna Press My Luck!"

"Don't get it caught in his thicket of back hair." Javen in reference to the Arby's Adventure Meal toy being rolled along Toastie's back. P.S.-Toastie does have amazing back hair.

"Pass the blue cheese."

"I need some pizza buddy."-Tommy, in response to me trying to get him in a cab back to our hotel. Tommy was highly intoxicated at the time, I wondered how it came to pass that he was still standing.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!"- Jitter and Billy

"I don't want you to think I just sleep with random dudes!"- Toastie's message to Pa Cregg for father's day. It's true, Danny and I are by no means random dudes.

Q:"What's Reyn throwing up in?"
A:" A Dodge Stratus."

"Tree! Slap! Boing!"- Possible lyrics to the song, "Roll out the barrel."

And finally, we need to, "FREEZE THOSE CARDS!"

Goodnight and godbless!


2 comments:

  1. "NNNNNhhhhgggggg." - Reyn, in aforementioned Dodge Stratus.

    "Take this left." - Jitter, several times between the Wood Street Cafe and Ma and Pa Jitter's house

    "Is that where Bill Jitters sleeps?" - Toastie

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  2. all I know is that I slept in the same bed with Javen-Me

    tommy, you spent 20 dollars on blow pops from a girl on a bachelorette party??

    Arby's!!!

    I need to get a copy of that tape from Billy. Sox up 1 nill. good stuff.

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