ROUNDOFFS: BURNING QUESTIONS EDITION

• What is the record for most pitches in an inning without giving up a run? Cause if Daisuke doesn't hold it, he must be close.
• Why is Mike Timlin even on the Red Sox playoff roster? Was it that sexy 5.66 E.R.A.?
  
• Can anyone stop the Dolphins "Wildcat"?
• Is Dan Orlovsky even aware of all the rules of football?
• Was anyone even aware that Dan Orlovsky plays football?
  
• Does Brett Favre crap golden eggs?
• How is it that Tim McCarver seemingly gets stupider by the minute?
  
• Was Terry Francona channeling Grady Little in ALCS Game 2?
• What's better? Dallas losing to Arizona or the Giants losing to the Browns?
  
• Or Battlestar Galactica?
  
• Does anyone else giggle every time So Taguchi is announced?
• Did the NFL really almost lose all its winless teams in the same day?
• Who put the "bop" in the bopshebopshebop?
  
• Seriously, who is Dan Orlovsky?
• Are we really sure you can't script October?
• Hey, remember a couple weeks ago when the Broncos were "great"?
• Remember six weeks ago when the Patriots were great?
• Is it just me, or is a Bills-Titans playoff rematch totally possible?
  
• DAN ORLOVSKY?! Anyone?
• Where is Breckin Meyer?
• Who's a bigger blowhard John Madden or Tim McCarver?
• Who is responsible for those ridiculous walkie-talkie cell phones? Cause they need to be talked to!
• Anyone else find it weird that no one has brought up the Summer Catch connection to the NLCS? I mean Freddie Prinze, Jr. was in the Phils organization, while his nemesis was with the Dodgers organization. Coincidence? Can't we script October?
  
• Is anyone else scared that John McCain could be the leader of the free world?
  
• Or how 'bout the fact that if he croaks, Sarah Palin would be running the free world?
• Do you think FOX was so glad to have the NLCS, cause there are no songs about Tampa that they could play over and over when the Rays did stuff?
• More annoying Bon Jovi's "I Love This Town" or John Cougar Mellencamp's, "This is our Country."?
• Where's the beef?
  
• Is Jim Haslett a good coach?
• How long before Art Shell takes over in Oakland?
• Will knowing practically nothing about the NHL actually help my fantasy hockey team?
• Who shot Laura Palmer?
• Is Joe Maddon a Mac or a PC?
• Why do hockey teams leave Canada? I mean baseball teams I can understand, but hockey? Hockey?! Well hopefully they can at least support the Bills.
  
• If there's something strange in the neighborhood, who ya gonna call?
• Why no more Kitna? WHY?!
• Did Joe Torre drop the ball by starting Derek Lowe on short rest?
• Is the best financial investment right now buying a large fry at McDonald's?
• Who is this Dow Jones fella and what's he doing to our money?
• How is Beverly Hills Chihuahua the number one movie in America?
  
• Has it already surpassed the box office numbers for Troop Beverly Hills?
• When will the madness end?
• What are the odds of my social security benefits being there when I retire?

Phew! Well that about wraps up this edition of "Roundoffs", hope you enjoyed and if you have answers to any of these "burning questions" please feel free to comment! As for me, I'm gonna make a sandwich and watch my stories.

NFL DRAUGHT

Yes, that's right folks with the NFL Draft just days away, and our drinking game alraedy out there, it's time to roll out the very first "Bitterness is a Fish You Can Catch NFL Draught"! Now this is a mainly beer-ish menu, so you won't find a Merlot Olsen, a Donald "Screw"-Driver, a Jeff Jaeger-meister, or a Sex on the Pat Beach. So here it is, drink it in.


DARK ALES:
THE JOEY PORTER- This robust beverage, is dark, rich and quite the heavy hitter. It's an all out blitz of the taste buds, so look out!

JERRY PORTER-This is a smoother porter than the Joey, but just as dark and rich. It is not quite as unreserved as the Joey either, but does have some kick. Perfect for the refrigerator raider, looking for a dark drink after a long day at the office.

KNUTE BROWN- Here's another delectable dark beer, you'll want to drink for the gipper. It really rock-nes!

OATMEAL STOUT-MIRE- You can rest assured, this one is, stout, on taste. Hahaha. Take your time and savor this one. Plus it's Wilford Brimley approved, as it's like drinking a bowl of Quaker Oats.

PALE AND BELGIAN ALES:
I.P.A.IKMAN- This is the star of our pale ales, so cowboy-up if you think you can handle it! It's an aromatic and classy choice, worthy of it's namesake.

PALE ALE DEL GRECO- Let me tell you, this is an Ale with some kick! This is a must try for every ale lover out there.

I.P.A.-KERS- While it is not as strong as the Pale Ale Del Greco, it can give you a good ol' kick in the pants, and make you soar.

I.P.YA.- A tittle-ating ale full of flavor and alcohol content. So watch out my friends, cause this drink is in the Hall of Fame.

AMBEUR-LEIN ALE- This light brown pale ale is very modest when it comes to hoppiness, but will overpower you with deliciousness.

FLEMISH RHETT- A mildly strong "beer" known for its reddish-brown color, it has a distinct fruity and yet acidy taste. But don't be fooled by the fruity taste, it can buc' ya after a while.

MINTER WARMER- Only served seasonally in the cold of winter, it is a wonderfully spiced beverage, that'll warm ya through and through.

WHEAT BEERS:
DANNY WHITE BEER- Not a drink that'll really overpower you, this is a nice drink for a laid back night at home with your significant other.

APRICOT WHEAT-LEY- For those looking to branch out in their drinking, this is a good place to start. Not to strong and a bit fruity, if you're into that thing. These are not words we would use to describe this beverages namesake , however.

DERON CHERRY WHEAT- One of our personal favorites! A chief staple at any good party, this is a sweet and refreshing beer, that is great for any occassion! Plus it's good for you, cause it has fruit!

HEFEWEIZEN-DEJAS- Kick it up a notch with this German wheat beer that'll have you drunk and in lederhosen in no time. This one is straight through the uprights!

And coming soon... the Ted Bel-Ginn White

LAGERS:
THE BRIAN UR-LAGER- As tenacious as the linebacker it's named for, it'll be no, bear, getting it down. We're dubbing this lager "The New Monster of the Midway."

JEFF LAGER-MAN- A dry lager for you jet-setters out there. It's cheap and delicious, and lager than life! Perfect for cookouts, barbecues or any gathering, really.

TY LAW-GER- You'll have to man-up if you're gonna take down this potent lager, worthy of the patriots of yore.

BOCKS:
DOPPELBOCK HUARD- A strong drink, not to be taken lightly. It has a huskiness about it, that'll have you coming back for more.

HASSELL-BOCK- This one is a strong and underrated beverage. It is stronger the Bock Huard, so it's no sissy drink, that's for sure.

BOCK-BERLIN- This one is not one of your better bocks, in fact it's really like a mere quarter-bock, when compared to the others.

LAMBICS AND MORE:
CRANBERRY LAMBIC-KETT- Duane should be proud to have his name on this lambic, as it is a delight! If you like cranberries, that is.

BLACKBERRY LAMBIC-KERT- This may be the only of it's kind, but it's as dark as the Raiders uniform worn by Mr. Bickert.

BLACK AND SURTAIN- If you like your half-and-halfs, than you'll love our black and tan offering.

MATT BAHR-LEY WINE- This has the most "kick" of any beverage on here, so lookout! It'll only take a couple of these to get your evening off to a right proper start.

BOBBY HE-BEER- (pronounced, ay-beer)- This is a cajun beer, pretty new to most of the world, so very few beerists would even know about it. But, by gumbo, it's a delicious, fiery, and yet saintly, brew. It's here, because he haven't figured out where to group it just yet.

Well there you have it, the first "Bitterness is a Fish You Can Catch NFL Draught." Hope you enjoyed.

WINING IN BOSTON

All three victuals are being used to raise money for each player's respective charity of choice.
Now while we have yet had the chance to partake of these spirits, we can still give you a preview.

The Schilling Schardonnay is no doubt robust, pompous and is a bit aged. It has a bitter aftertaste that lingers on for quite some time. After drinking mass quantities, you will find an air of superiority around yourself and will proceed to voice your opinions on everything from politics to blogging, regardless of whether or not they are being asked for or listened to.

The Manny Being Merlot is a more casual beverage. It packs a wallop, and gives off a dizzying effect. Will make the drinker lose focus and become lacksadaisacal. After drinking it you may have trouble with depth pereption and judgement.

The Caber Knuckle is a very well-respected blend, that can be hard to predict. A good batch can be scintillating and knock you on your behind, while other times it can have very little effect. Overall it's a solid drink.

Stay tuned for other Sawx to join in the fun as well, perhaps a Papi Grigio, or Cabernet Papelbon? We'll keep a lookout.