Tuesday, January 30, 2007



COLT TELECOM GROUP: You can be sure this telecommunications group based in the United Kingdom will be rooting on the Colts in Super Bowl XLI. The ones that can stay up that is, as the game will kick-off around 11:30ish in London. Of course they'd rather be watching classic London Monarchs games with Stan Gelbaugh at the helm.

COLT MANUFACTURING COMPANY: Of course the Colt manufacturaing company is responsible for manufacturing many firearms from the Colt Patterson to the Colt King Cobra. And of course as a result of this, you know that Charlton Heston and the NRA will be cheering on a team with the same name as one of their favorite gun brands. Because of this connection we would also guess that Vice President, Dick Cheney will be cheering on the team he just calls the Indianapolis Big Honkin' Guns. Actually Cheney tried to get a bill through Congress to make the name change official, but it met with staunch resistance.

COLT CAR COMPANY: Another tie-in to the United Kingdom. Colt is the British importer for Mitsubishi Ltd., who of course is responsible for making the Mitsubishi Colt supermini. In fact they will be the unofficial sponsors of Colts' DBs Jason David and Bob Sanders who will be the miniest Colts on the field, height wise only, I'm sure, come Sunday, with both standing at 5'8.

COLT KIRBY: Heathcliff "Combustible" Huxtable's favorite oater, Colt Kirby starred in (insert number here) of westerns, referenced in several episodes of the Cosby Show. Peyton Manning will hope to save the day and ride off into the sunset with a shiny football trophy just like this Colt of old.

MR. ED: A horse is a horse of course, of course and no one can talk to a horse of course, unless of course the horse is the famous Mr. Ed. While the talking equine, is most likely dead right now, but I'm sure he will be throwing down his support from that big stable in the sky.

QUICK DRAW MCGRAW: The lovable cartoon sheriff and his deputy, Baba Looey, not to be confused with Baba-booey, will be rooting on the Colts. It'd also be a cool nickname for Peyton Manning who is known for getting the ball out just before the rush gets to him, in a quick draw manner. Now sure, as a sheriff in the old west, McGraw and Looey are truly Cowboys fans, but when it comes down to Colts against Bears, they will be cheering on Peyton and the Colts.

POKEY: Gumby's clay-mation steed will be in the Colts corner for this one. He represents all the class, ethics, morals and whatevers, Tony Dungy instills in his team. Also it ties in with the Colts pregame ritual, of the hokey-pokey led by Peyton Manning.

YOGI AND BOO BOO: Yes these two are ecstatic about the big game. Instead of stealing picnic baskets to enjoy during the game, they will be pilfering some sack lunches in honor of what the Bears will be doling out to Peyton Manning come Sunday. And watch for the Bears trick play, "The Picnic Basket", in the big game.

GENTLE BEN: Ah yes, the big friendly bear, will be rootin' hard for the team from the Windy City. With a lot of time on his hands after his talk show faltered he has taken in every Bears game. But, unlike Ben, the football team plans to be less than gentle with Peyton and the Colts.

TEDDY RUXPIN: The talking stuffed animal is a long time Bears fan and will root on the squad in his creepy computerized voice.

GEORGE PAPADOPOLOUS: Yes, the retired Bear great will be rooting on his former employers whole-heartedly, as he and Ma'am host their big Super Bowl bash in Chigago. Whether Webster will make an appearance or not is still unknown he may have plans elsewhere, possibly with Hammer or Patrick Ewing.

THE CARE BEARS: The whole group is ready for this game, especially Cheer Bear. Of course Bedtime Bear is afraid he will miss the end of the game because it starts so late and Grumpy Bear is upset about Rex Grossman's inconsistency. All the Care Bear Cousins will be at Cheer Bear's Super Bowl Party as well, even Noble Heart, although he will be silently rooting for the Colts. And soon we'll find out if the Care Bear stare works on Peyton Manning and the Colts.

WINNIE THE POOH: Oh bother, Pooh will shed his red tee, for a Bears jersey, most likely Tom Waddle, on Sunday. Most of the gang will be gathered at Pooh Corner to watch the game. Most will be cheering on the Bears as well, except for Rabbitt because he's got somethin' ridin on the Colts.

FOZZIE BEAR: The wise-crackin', orange bear is most definitely in the Bears corner, wocka, wocka, wocka! His favorite Bear, Adewale, wale, wale Ogunleye.

THE GUMMI BEARS: These magical bears will be decking their tree out in orange and black streamers for the big game in support of the team. In fact they are also each shaving a letter of "GO BEARS" into their furry little chests.

Well those are just a few of the famous Colts and Bears who are gearing up for the big game. Tune in tomorrow for more idiocy en route to Super Bowl XLI and Soup-er Bowl I.

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