GROUNDHOGS, JITTERS AND WHAT HAVE YOUS!

WELL HAPPY GROUNDHOG'S DAY FOLKS! NOW WE WERE TRYING TO FIND A GROUNDHOG TIE-IN TO THE BIG GAME TO GO ALONG WITH OUR CONTINUED SUPER BOWL COVERAGE. MAYBE WE'D EXPLORE HOW IMPORTANT THE GROUNDHOGS, AKA THE RUNNING BACKS, WOULD BE IN SUPER BOWL XLI. OR MAYBE JUST A QUICK LOOK AT THE RUNNING BACKS IN THE GAME, JOSEPH ADDAI IN THE LIFE, DOMINIC COLOSSUS AT RHODES, CEDRIC BENSON AND HEDGES OR THOMAS "IT'S NOT UNUSUAL" JONES. BUT THAT SEEMED A LITTLE BORING AND A LITTLE TOO IN-DEPTH FOR THIS BLOG. I MEAN, WE'LL SAVE THAT KIND OF INSIGHT FOR ESPN.COM, CBSSPORTSLINE.COM AND CNNSI.COM. BUT THEN I THOUGHT ABOUT HOW DOMINIC RHODES PRONOUNCES HIS NAME LIKE "DOMINIQUE". MAYBE THERE WAS SOMETHING THERE, ESPECIALLY SINCE THE BEARS HAVE SOMEONE NAMED DANIEAL MANNING, WHO PRONOUNCES HIS NAME LIKE "DANIELLE". TWO GIRLY NAMES BATTLING EACH OTHER IN THE BIGGEST FOOTBALL GAME OF THE YEAR. BUT THAT DIDN'T SEEM LIKE IT COULD CARRY AN ENTIRE BLOG. THAN WE THOUGHT, GROUNDHOGS, RUNNING....MAYBE WE COULD DO SOMETHING WITH THE FACT THAT THE COLTS HAVE SOMEONE NAMED TJ RUSHING ON THEIR TEAM AND THE BEARS HAVE A GUY NAMED JD RUNNELS ON THEIR SQUAD. NOW WHILE THAT ALSO WOULDN'T CARRY A BLOG, IT MADE US THINK. THEIR NAMES TJ AND JD? WAIT TJ BACKWARDS IS JT JUST LIKE THE NICKNAME FOR OUR BELOVED UNCLE JITTER. NOW THOSE INITIALS COME FROM HIS FIRST AND LAST NAME BUT THE INITIALS FOR HIS FIRST AND MIDDLE NAMES (DRUM ROLL)......JD? WEIRD, HUH? WAIT, WE'RE STILL GOING.....

THEN WE REALIZED IT WAS JITTER'S, BIRTHDAY. YES OUR 6'10 EX-PORTUGUESE BASKETBALL PLAYER IS TURNING THE BIG 29! MAYBE WE COULD DO SOMETHING WITH THAT. MAYBE THERE WERE SOME SUPER BOWL TIE-INS WITH JITTER OR HIS HOMELAND OF LANDFILL, OH. NAHHH! WE'LL JUST WISH HIM A HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND BE DONE WITH IT. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG BABY JITTERS! AND MANY MORE.


SO WHAT, IN THE HECK, IS THIS BLOG GONNA BE ABOUT?! WELL WHAT IS GROUNDHOG'S DAY ABOUT, I ASK YOU? NO, NOT JUST A FURRY RODENT, NO, NO. IT'S ABOUT HIS SHADOW AND WHETHER OR NOT HE SEES HIS SHADOW. YES, THE SHADOW, THAT'S THE RUB. SO WE ARE GONNA DELVE INTO THE WHOLE PEYTON MANNING NOT BEING ABLE TO WIN THE BIG GAME. NOW HE HAS FINALLY GOT THE BELICHIK MONKEY OFF HIS BACK, BUT IF HE DOESN'T WIN THE SUPER BOWL, HE WILL JOIN THE RANKS AND OF DAN MARINO AND JIM KELLY AS "GREAT" QUARTERBACKS WITHOUT A SUPER BOWL RING. BUT WE HERE AT "BITTERNESS" FEEL THAT IT'S NOT FAIR TO JUDGE THE QUALITY OF A PLAYER BASED ON WHETHER OR NOT HE HAD A SUPER BOWL RING OR NOT. NOW, WE ARE NOT SO NAIVE AS TO THINK THAT A QB CAN'T TURN AN ENTIRE GAME TO POOP FOR THEIR TEAM (SEE NEIL O' DONNELL), BUT ONLY ONE TEAM WINS EVERY YEAR, AND IT IS, AFTER ALL A TEAM GAME. SO TODAY WE'RE GONNA MAKE PEYTON MANNING FEEL A LITTLE AT EASE BY GIVING SEVERAL PLAYERS WHO HAVE SUPER BOWL RINGS, BUT ARE NOWHERE NEAR AS GOOD AS MR. MANNING. BUT FOR NOW PEYTON WILL LURK IN THEIR SHADOWS. YOU SEE WHAT I DID THEIR?

PHIL SIMMS: While he did put on a good show in the Super Bowl, his career numbers were not spectacular and Peyton's career numbers will easliy eclipse Simms' stats. Also Simmsy will be calling the big game, let's see if they talk about Phil's (also the groundhog's name) Super Bowl experience. God I hope he does! We, here, will keep our fingers crossed.

JEFF HOSTETLER: Thrust into the role due to injury, Hostettler did what he was supposed to, and not lose the game for his team. Now, in all fairness, this is a game the Giants very well could've and should've lost. Hostetler did manage to eventually parlay this success into a future contract with the Raiders, where he got to really air it out. He, of course, took over for another great quarterback who does not have a ring, Jay Schroeder.

BEN ROETHLISBERGER: Well let's get out of the way first, this Steelers Super Bowl run, is arguably the biggest farce in the history of the game. Let's leave it at that. But we saw the real Big Ben this year. He is not good! Sure everyone will write this past season off to almost dying in a motorcycle accident and then that whole appendicitis thing. This was just a convenient coincidence to help lull Steelers fans into a false sense of hope for next season.

BRAD JOHNSON: I don't really think I need to write to much here. BJ is a solid and consistent quarterback, but, like many of the QBs on this list, won his ring due in large part to a good defense and bit 'o' luck.

TRENT DILFER: See Brad Johnson entry above.

MARK RYPIEN: Although he could, quite possibly, be the best player on this list, he is light years behind Peyton Manning and the numbers he can put up. But Mr. Rypien has a ring to polish and as of now Peyton does not.

AND POSSIBLY REX GROSSMAN: Yes, if in fact the Bears win this Super Bowl, Rex in FX will be added to this list and the "Peyton can't win the big one" will continue on. Rex could quite possibly become the worst quarterback to ever win a Super Bowl!

BUT IF PEYTON DOES WIN, WHAT'LL WE TALK ABOUT, NEXT? WILL BE IF TOM BRADY CAN EVER WIN ANOTHER SUPER BOWL? NO, NO, NO. WE'LL CLEARLY BE DISCUSSING THE NEXT BEST QB IN LINE TO NOT WIN A SUPER BOWL. THAT'S RIGHT! THE ONE, THE ONLY, THE INCOMPARABLE , JON KITNA! THIS BLOG WAS SPONSORED BY VEGGIE-BOY. I LIKE IT!