WEEK 2: ANNIE GET YOUR GUNSLINGER

Well, week one has come and gone and I looked fairly competent, going 10-6. Is that right? Doesn't sound right, does it? Ah well. Week two is bound to show me for the simp I really am. Anyways I have to type quick as I think the Sports Guy has bugged by apartment in order to get a sneak peak at my picks, so away we go...........


BUFFALO @ PITTSBURGH: The Bills is feisty my friends and yes that bad English was intentional. Sorry mom. I think they will go into the Burgh and snatch a win they will most certainly, relish. Buffalo 5-3

CINCINNATI @ CLEVELAND: So first the Brownies are all hush-hush about which mediocre QB they'd use in Week One. Then the "chosen one" proceeds to quickly get benched for the "chosen #2" , while the "golden boy" draft pick, who has only practiced for a couple of weeks, watches from the sideline. Now, after the Week One, or in the Browns case "Weak One", drubbing, they proceed to trade away the aforementioned "chosen one", leaving the mediocre "chosen #2" and the "golden boy" draft pick to vie for the starting QB job. Is this Cleveland, or an episode of "Dallas"? Either way Cincy should roll. Bengals 24-10

INDIANAPOLIS @ TENNESSEE: Still not overly impressed with the Titans, a win over Indy could change that. Unfortunately I don't see it. Colts 21-10

HOUSTON @ CAROLINA: A pretty intriguing match-up of two undefeated squads. Sure it's only 1-0, but there's 16 teams who can't be in that rare air. Now, it's hard to say if it was a matter of these two being good in week one or their opponents just stinking up the joint? Who knows? Guess we'll find out in Week 2, right? I say Steve Smith will give the Texans problems all afternoon. Panthers 26-17.

SAN FRANCISCO @ ST. LOUIS: San Fran did manage a win in week one, albeit against the "Kingdom of the Mighty Cardinal", but looked a bit sloppy doing it, or so I'm told, it was on waaaaay past my bed time. I think Stephen Jackson is gonna be looking to put week one behind him and find some redemption, which won't be easy. The 49ers can play "D", especially that Patrick "Whatchoo talkin' 'bout" Willis. It is so tempting to take the Niners, but the coin flip says I'm going Rammers at home, 24-20

GREEN BAY @ NEW YORK GIANTS: The gunslingest gunslinger that has ever gunslinged, or gunslung, will be in the Meadowlands on Sunday facing a Giants secondary that, well, let's just say, they are not good. Throw in a lack of Brandon Jacobs and an iffy Eli (we of course mean more iffy than usual, cause of his shoulder) and you got yourselves a stew, baby! Eli's status could make a huge difference, but I stIll think the G-Men are in trouble. Packers 35-27

ATLANTA @ JACKSONVILLE: Egads, the Falcons looked awful last week! How many times throughout this season will the Falcons regret not keeping Matt "Stump the" Schaub? I say 143, but that's just me. Jaguars get the running game back on track and beat up the dirty birds 21-6

NEW ORLEANS @ TAMPA BAY: The Saints will have had a long time to think about their Week One pummeling come kickoff time Sunday. That's not good news for the Buccaneers. Saints 34-10

MINNESOTA @ DETROIT: Alright Kitna, one win down, nine to go, my friend. Here's comes number two. Okay that sounds nasty. Here comes win number two, somehow? Lions 21-20

DALLAS @ MIAMI: I suppose it would be asking to much of God to have this stadium spontaneously combust during the game? Yes this is a matchup of my two least favorite franchises and two least favorite fandoms. Since they probably won't tie, I guess the Cowboys will beat up on the Dolphins, so take that Snowflake! By the way, the 'Skins in week one, 'Boys in week two, are the Dolphins in the NFC now? Wishful thinking I guess. Um, Cowboys 20-3.

SEATTLE @ ARIZONA: Now, I would like to say the Seahawks will roll in this one, but their performance against the Bucs last week was borderline pathetic. This has upset written all over it! So, naturally, I'm taking the favorite, dah! Seahawks 49-35

NEW YORK JETS @ BALTIMORE: That Brian Billick sure is an offensive, dare I say, genius. 20, count 'em 20 points against the Bengals. Oh man! Are you detecting the sarcasm, cause I'm laying it on pretty thick. Here's the thing the Ravens are favored by ten points. TEN! Me still thinks the Jets are a bit better than they showed on Sunday, and they'll either be facing a hobbled Steve McNair or a healthy Kyle Boller, which may or may not be, half a dozen of one and half a dozen of the other. I am so confident that the Jets will cover that if they don't I will dedicate a whole blog to the wonder that is the Ravens. Okay, well let's not get crazy here. How about I just give them some credit next week and apologize for doubting their superiority? Ravens 7-6

OAKLAND @ DENVER: There's not really any statistical or factual data that will support the Raiders beating, well, really, most teams, so I'm afraid it's 0-2 for the silver and black. Broncos 24-13.

KANSAS CITY @ CHICAGO: I really couldn't tell you what the heck is even going on in Kansas City folks. And to think, people in KC had to endure another long summer with the Royals and this is the thanks they get? Bears 28-14

SAN DIEGO @ NEW ENGLAND: Little known fact about the penalties thrown at Bill Belichik: included in the fine print is a stipulation that will allow him to only use a Betamax machine for the next three weeks. True story! Or is it? You decide. Anyways, if the Patriots actually just managed to tape the Chargers-Bears game, they could try and see what the Bears did to more or less contain LT, aka Hooch. I's a toughy, but I'm taking the Pats, but barely. 21-20

WASHINGTON @ PHILADELPHIA: The first place Redskins head into the ever hostile Linc for a Monday nighter. Let's just say, it's probably the last time this season I'll have to type "first place Redskins." But isn't it just a bit peculiar that in week one, Philly lost 16-13 and Washington won 16-13? Hmmm? Hmmmm? Hmmmmm? BAH! Eagles 27-13