FINE, WE'LL PUT IN TONY ROMO

Here is some "Bitterness" breaking news out of Dallas: Terrell Owens has reportedly tryed to kill himself. Owens said he was depressed, and why wouldn't he be? He gets paid millions of dollars a year to play the game he "loves", run off at the mouth and be one of the most overrated recievers there is. I'm depressed just thinking about it right now! All those "antics" and touchdown celebrations were an obvious cry for help and no one saw it. Of course, the real story is, two more pills would have killed him, but when his "friend" at the scene tossed them to him, his old alligator arms couldn't reel them in and they went down the drain. The rumors that this friend was Jeff Garcia have neither been confirmed nor denied. All in all it seems like a bit much to get a quarterback change. The Cowboys will hold a press conference today to most likely announce that they will hand over the offensive reins in "Big D" to Tony Romo once Owens is able to return. Saying that Owens needn't have been so dramatic over the whole thing. If he had wanted Romo in there all he had to do was ask. I think I can speak for most of my readers when I say, better luck next time T.O.! And now a look back at the signs of depression that we all chose to ignore:

Loss of energy:



Decreased ability to make decisions or concentrate:


Decreased interest or pleasure in usual activities:


Constant feelings of sadness,


irritability,


and tension:
And of course the biggest sign of all...wearing funny, often times plaid, sport coats:



All the signs were there and we didn't even see them. From the bottom of my heart Terrell, I apologize for all of us and once again I say better luck next time. This has been a "Bitterness" breaking news bulletin.