WEEK 8: BYE, BYE KITNA

Well, it was another losing week in Bitter Country, but luckily I tied "The Guy" and maintain my five game lead and still am the only combatant in my challenge, that the other two know nothing about, that is flying above .500. But before I get into this weeks picks let me address a few things from last week:

BASEBALL: Does anyone else want to slap Yadier Molina in the face or perhaps give him a quick jab to the neck? I don't know what it is about him, he just annoys the bajeezus out of me. And I hate when they start saying, "The Cardinals got help from the unlikeliest of players, Yadier Molina." Okay anyone who follows baseball knows that is exactly who you should expect to step up. Mark Lemke, hardly a superstar, but boy could he hit in the postseason. And of course you already know my feeling on Tim McCarver. What gets me, is, grass can't grow on rocks, yet McCarver has or at least had hair. Discuss amongst yourselves.

The funniest thing that happened during Game 7, was when they announced Jose Reyes was coming up, my special lady friend started singing, "Jose Reyes, Jose Reyes." Just like when they sing "Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius" in Planet of the Apes the musical. I laughed heartily. If I had a beverage in my mouth it would have been promptly spit out. Alas I did not and now on to the Week 8 picks:

After a look at the current standings (last week's results in parentheticals):
" Bitterness" - 52-48 (6-7)
" The Guy" - 47-53 (6-7)
" MMQB"- 45-55 (8-5)- Yes you read that correctly

CARDINALS @ PACKERS- Well Denny Green apparently blaming the Offensive Coordinator and dismissing him was not the answer. I like how Denny Green actually said he didn't agree with the play calling down the stretch of the Bears game. Like the Head Coach can't take over the reigns or say something? Well let's see Denny, you fire your OC and then put up a 9-spot on Oakland. OAKLAND! For cryin out loud! How does Denny Green still have a job? Well now they head to Lambeau against everyone's favorite gunslinger and, well, it just seems like it won't turn out well for the Cards. Packers win it 30-24

FALCONS @ BENGALS- Well this is doozy, for sure. Much as I suspected the Falcons are a somewhat inconsistent team, that could very well make the playoffs. Get this: Mikey Vick actually threw, yes threw, for four touchdowns! Well that may not happen again, at least for a long while anyways. I feel the Bengals are a good team, but I don't know how well they can shutdown the Falcons running game. If the Bengals can manage to stay out of jail between now and Sunday they'll win this one by a slim margin 27-26.

RAVENS @ SAINTS- Now Brian Billick, do you really think that Jim Fassel was the problem? I think it's time to take a long hard look in the mirror Brian. What you find may surprise you. This'll be close and I suggest taking the under as the Saints win it 9-5.

TEXANS @ TITANS- Another one of those classic battles, from the most historic of divisions, the AFC South. I mean aside from the Colts you are looking at three teams that have a long and colorful history. The Texans are red hot right now, riding that one game winning streak into Tennesee. While the Titans have now gone consecutive weeks without losing and something's gotta give. I take the Texans hot streak, because we know how well they dismiss the ghosts of the hallowed Coliseum. Oh and fun note the Titans home is now, also, the official home to the Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl! Gaylord hotels? Really? That's the best name you could come up with? Who are the ad wizards behind this one? And who thought this would be a good sponsor for a college Bowl game? Anyways, Texans take it 17-16. (Check the name of one of the Gaylord hotels to your right.)

JAGUARS @ EAGLES- Oh Eagles, you do find tragic ways to lose, don't you? But in roll the Jaguars, who were embarrassed by the, is that right, the Texans? Eagles should start winning again, starting with this one 30-17.

SEAHAWKS @ CHIEFS- The Seahawks offense will be lead by Seneca Wallace? I thought he was like their fourth or fifth receiver? Well they can just run the ball and eat clock, right? Their running back is WHO?! Maurice Morris? Hey Maurice Carthon is out of work now, maybe he'd like to run for them this week. Just a thought. The Chiefs were fired up enough to beat the Chargers last week and they have Turner and Hooch! And Vel-J! All signs point to a Chiefs win, which will put the 'Hawks in a real hole in the AFC West, behind San Diego and Denver. Bummer. The Chiefs win it 22-19

49ERS @ BEARS- What a great TECMO matchup! Am I right?! Unfortunately, the 49ers are far, far, far, far, far, far, far, far, FAR removed from the TECMO glory days. Somewhere Tom Rathman is watching, drinking a Keystone Light out of the can, unhappy at what his former employer has become. Bears roll 27-6

BUCCANEERS @ GIANTS- I refuse to acknowledge this as Barber bowl, since no one acknowledged the Seahawks-Giants game as Hasselbeck Bowl! Wouldn't it be fun if they just mutually agreed to suit up for the other team and fool EVERYONE! That's something right out of the Patty Duke show. No? How about Sister, Sister? Better? Okay, ya bunch of uncouth heathens. Umm, I guess the Giants hold off a late B-Grad charge and win it 21-17.

RAMS @ CHARGERS- I'm still don't know what to make of the Rams. Or the Chargers, for that matter. This is close, but I don't think the Rams will have enough to overtake the Chargers in the confines of good 'ol Qualcomm Stadium. The Super Chargers are electric in this one and win it 31-23.

COLTS @ BRONCOS- This is a great matchup, as is a battle between an actual colt and an actual bronco. While a colt may be younger and faster, the bronco is of course untamed and there ain't no accounting for that my friends! Also the Broncos have allowed only 2 "garbage" touchdowns all season, and I don't care who you're playing (unless it's like the Helen Keller school for the blind and deaf) that's gall-darn impressive. This is the biggest test the Broncos "D" has had thus far this year. And while, I don't know for sure if they'll keep that stud Peyton out of the endzone they will prevail in this one 17-13.

JETS @ BROWNS- Ahhh, the matchup we've all been waiting for! Okay that's a bold-faced lie, but it will be interesting seeing two former Belichik disciples going toe to toe, mano a mano, head to....well you get the picture. Now the major sports writers may have not found out this little tid bit, but the losing head coach is buying the winning head coach pizza after the game. That's a hot lead and only "Bitterness" was able to bring it to you. When pizza's on the line go with Mangini, trust me! Jets take it 25-17.

STEELERS @ RAIDERS- My mom always said if you didn't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. But then again, that would make this a pretty boring blog. Irregardless, I'm just giving you the score. Steelers 27-13

COWBOYS @ PANTHERS- Romo phrases and slogans Dallas fans missed out on:
All roads lead to Romo
Romo Arrogato
Romo-sexual (That's Billyball's)
Romocop
The Romo-n Empire
more to come, rest assured......
The Panthers don't create a welcome atmosphere for Romo's first start on Sunday night and win it 21-10

PATRIOTS @ VIKINGS- Two teams who generally play close games. Look for much of the same in this one. Patriots win it 24-23.

That's my blog, I'll try and do better next time.