JETS @ PATRIOTS: Bottom line, if Broadway Brett and the Jets wanna be taken seriously they're gonna have to win this one. But even below that line, is the fact they won't. Pats 24-20.
BRONCOS @ FALCONS: A good old fashioned Super Bowl XXXIII rematch. The Broncos can't seem to stop much of anyone these days. Couple that with the "coolness" of Matty Ice and all signs point to a Falcon victory. Falcons 31-23.
RAIDERS @ DOLPHINS: A battle between two of my three most hated NFL franchises. The Cowboys are the other for those of you scoring at home. Quite honestly, I can't find anything that would warrant picking the Raiders to win this, or pretty much any, game. Under the "Cable Guy" the Raiders are 1-4. In those five games thay have been outscored 117-35. An average score of about 23-7. Lose the anomaly that was the win against the Jets and they have lost by a combined score of 104-19 or an average loss of almost 21-4. So we're going with the 'Phins 24-6.
RAVENS @ GIANTS: Another Super Bowl rematch on Sunday's docket. This should have a decidedly different outcome than Super Bowl XXXV. Look for this one to get down right dirty. I can't say for a fact that Terrell Suggs has put a bounty on Plaxico Burress, but if there were any Giant to put one one, it would have to be Plax right? Right? Giants 23-16.
TEXANS @ COLTS: Texans-Colts round 2! Don't pay for the whole seat, cause you'll only need the edge! If it weren't for Sage Rosenfels almost literally handing the Colts a win, then, well, the Texans would have won. What? Its true. You were maybe expecting something witty and or profound? Colts 31-24.
TITANS @ JAGUARS: It took a game against the Lions for the Jags to get an easy win. Other than that Lions game the average margin of victory was less than five. So we figure its safe to assume that the Jags and their fans are headed for another agonizing defeat. Titans 21-17.
BEARS @ PACKERS: First meeting of the year between these two bitter division rivals taking place on the not quite frozen tundra of Lambeau Field. Also the first time the Bears have ever faced Aaron Rodgers. What does that mean? Nothing really, just a fact is all. The Packers have lost two in a row to pretty solid defenses and it don't get much solider than the Bears defense. And I'm sure da Bears would lovie to make A-Rodg eat turf all afternoon and put the Pack two back in the NFC North. Bears 23-18.
EAGLES @ BENGALS: For the first time in awhile the Bengals are coming off a win. In fact, they haven't lost in two weeks, thanks to a bye. Just the Bengals luck, when they win and try and build some momentum they get a bye week. And then the Eagles! Eagles 27-13.
SAINTS @ CHIEFS: Tyler Thigpen, competent NFL quarterback? Really? And the Chiefs have been getting ever so close to winning their second game of the year. Which is why I'm making this my utterly stupid upset of the week. Chiefs 31-28.
LIONS @ PANTHERS: Let's see the Panthers are 7-2, sitting atop the NFC South. The Lions are, well, the Lions. In this jungle cat battle, its the Panthers 28-13.
VIKINGS @ BUCCANEERS: The Vikes got a much needed win against the Packers last week, and doesn't get any easier this week. The Bucs are currently tied with two other teams for the two NFC Wild Card spots. The Vikes are a game back of that logjam, making this yet another big game for the Minnesotans. I, for one, am not sold on the Vikes as a playoff team. Bucs 28-23.
RAMS @ NINERS: Ah, the "Who Gives a Crap?" Bowl. Seriously is there a more meaningless game this week? That was a rhetorical question. I mean really, both teams shouldn't even be trying to win, it'll only hurt their draft position. Um Niners 27-20.
CARDINALS @ SEAHAWKS: I will go out on a limb and make the Cardinals my lock of the week! If you need an explanation, you obviously haven't watched football lately. Cards 31-17.
CHARGERS @ STEELERS: The Chargers head east, which thus far this season, has not been good for those west coasters. If you were to buy into that theory you'd pick the Steelers. Now while I don't think the west to east thing will be a factor, I will take the Steelers 28-21.
REDSKINS @ COWBOYS: Gotta think the 'Boys need this one if they wanna stay in the playoff hunt. Well Jimmy "Crack" Zorn and I don't care! 'Skins 27-23.
BROWNS @ BILLS: Ah, the battle of teams named after a person. The Bills need to turn things around in this one, if they want to remain a playoff contender in the AFC. And I think they will rise to the occasion and befuddle the "Medicine Woman". Bills 27-17.
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