Friday, October 24, 2008

WEEK EIGHT: NICK AND KITNA'S INFINITE PLAYLIST

This certainly is a topsy-turvy roller coaster ride of an NFL season thus far. I mean who's for real, who's not? I just don't know! Its is a dog-gone mystery worthy of Scoob and the gang, for sure. Well, last week's picks were, well, let's move on to this weeks picks:

RAIDERS @ RAVENS: The NFL has become as unpredictable as the weather in New England. The weather in New England being very unpredictable, is where I was going with that. So the first game under The Cable Guy, the Raiders got served up a big ol' whoopin' at the hands of the mighty Saints! So naturally it stood to reason that Brett "Aging Gunslinger" Favre would also have his way with Oakland, right? Wrong! They not only didn't get blown out, they won! Yes, the Raiders. Meanwhile the Ravens and their "bounty hunting" defense were absolutely shredded by Peyton Manning and the Colts. So of course, the Miami "Wildcat" was now gonna give them a challenge, right? Survey says, "EHHHHHHHHHH!" So I'm just gonna go and pretend that those last two weeks didn't happen in picking this one. Ravens 21-10.

CHARGERS vs. SAINTS @ LONDON, ENGLAND: Well, this at least, is a better match-up than last year's debacle across the pond. Get ready for some bangers and mash! The Chargers and Saints are also tough to predict. The Chargers are as up and down as a teeter-totter right now and the Saints just got mauled by the Panthers, so who knows what's gonna happen here? I certainly don't! I'm hoping for a shootout, personally, but if the weather's anything like last year's scrum, that won't happen. I guess Chargers 23-21.

CHIEFS @ JETS: Is Eric Mangini on the hot seat? Is Brett Favre helping the Lions? Is Brett Favre helping the Jets? Are the Jets even good? These are just a few questions I want answers to. An the Chies will provide answers to none of them. I mean they are but one hit away from Ingle Martin IV? I just don't know who that even is? Jets 35-15.

BILLS @ DOLPHINS: Bills are only one and a half point favorites in this one. One and a half?! Jinkies! I reckon that don't seem right at all. Not. At. All. Williams 23-17.

BUCCANEERS @ COWBOYS: This one 's a very intriguing match-up indeed. The Bucs, are actually pretty good. Jeff Garcia is back to being the "bee's knees"! While the Cowboys are the NFL's current soap opera. Everything points to a Bucs win in this one, but I'm gonna ignore all that. That's right because every week up becomes down, down becomes up, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria...oh, sorry I lost my train of thought. I'll take "As the 'Boys Turn" 24-21.

FALCONS @ EAGLES: The Falcons are yet another team muddled in the middle of the muck. Are they good? Are they not? I just don't know! The Eagles we thought were good and maybe they are? I just don't know! Eagles 31-24.

RAMS @ PATRIOTS: Everyone loves a Super Bowl rematch from several years ago, am I right? No? Well Rams fans might see the perfect time for some revenge. Of course beating Matt Cassel may only ease some of the left over pain. The Rams are hot, but are the Patriots the cold shower the doctor ordered? I really just don't know, but I'd like to think so. Pats 28-20.

CARDINALS @ PANTHERS: Add two more to the list of teams that may or may not be for real. I thought the Panthers were not for real after being "buc"-ed by Tampa, and what do they do? They go out and beat up on the Saints and shut down Drew Brees. Huh? Well, maybe the Saints aren't that good? I just don't know! Are the Panthers actually good? I just don't know! Then there's the Cardinals. Ah, the Kingdom of the Mighty Cardinal. After "The Gunslinger" had his way with the Cards, everyone, and I mean everyone, figured this was the same old Cardinals. But was it? They beat up the Williams and then the 'Boys. Of course the Williams lost Trent Edwards and the 'Boys lost to the Rams and barely edged the Bengals. So I just don't know?! I'm just gonna go with the home team I guess. Panthers 34-28.

LIONS @ REDSKINS: One sure thing we can rely on in these trying times is the Lions losing, right? Well, so far so good! But they are getting dangerously close to winning a game. Will this be the week? As much as I'd like to think the answer to that question is "yes", I just can't. Which of course means Dan Orlovsky will probably torch the Potatoskins for 3-hunny plus and a few TDs. 'Skins 28-14.

BROWNS @ JAGUARS: Uh, I'm getting bored just thinking about this game. Its amazing how Braylon Edwards 'stone hands' are so much more prominent when he's not balancing them with awesomeness and winning. Jags 27-21.

GIANTS @ STEELERS: Game of the week right here folks! Now I wish they could both lose, but that happening is just about, in the words of Ralph Wiggum, "unpossible"! Now as exciting as this game of running, defense and field position (yay punting!) is, we can only hope Steelers fans spice it up a bit by throwing pickles or condiment packets at Plaxico Burress. Fingers crossed. Steelers 17-13.

SEAHAWKS @ NINERS: Let the Mike Singletary era begin! Singletary is probably one of the best defensive players in Tecmo Bowl history. I mean, his real life career was good as well, but he was a Tecmo god! I think only Lawrence Taylor was in the same video game league as Singletary. Good enough for me! Niners 28-7.

BENGALS @ TEXANS: Can anyone give me one reason the Bengals will win this one? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? Fair enough. Texans 37-21.

COLTS @ TITANS: Just when I though the Colts were back, they go and get Lambeau-ed in Green Bay. What to make of this? Stop me if you've heard this, but I just don't know! The Titans are as solid as they come right now, so I'd have to be an idiot to pick the Colts, right? NO, I am not picking the Colts you bunch of wisenheimers! Titans 21-14.

2 comments:

  1. BLARGH!!! Not in the habit of rootin' for the Giants I see. This is something that desperately has to change. C'mon Willie Moe, you're better than that.

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  2. Yeah, they irk me. I miss Greg Comella, that left a bad taste in my mouth. I never have, probably never will, like Plax. I'm a Listerine man, you know that!

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